Although sometimes I believe that we do a disservice to the idea of family by exalting a cultural definition of it as a biblical norm, there can be no doubt that families are important to the development, growth and stability of individuals, groups and societies in the world. We learn how to behave, cooperate and grow in the context of a family. Therefore, whether my particular family group is “normal” or “dysfunctional,” my family is the most important group in my life. And if that is true, I (and you as well) ought to have an idea what the Bible says about how family members should get along with one another. To that end, I offer a series of lists- The Family Lists. And because I know the role of husband as well as any of them, I start there.
Biblical suggestions for husbands:
- Husbands are to love their wives (Ep. 5.25). Wives are not to be taken for granted, but are to be cherished, respected and cared for. In fact, the love of a husband for his wife should be similar to the love of Christ for the church. Would you die for your wife?
- Husbands are to support and build their wives (Ep. 5.26-27). Husbands should be making their wives better people. Celebrate with your wife. Encourage her. Be her greatest cheerleader.
- Husbands are to love their wives like they love themselves (Ep. 5.28-29). Take care of your wife like you take care of your own grooming, appearance, health and exercise.
- Husbands should love their wives more than anything else. You should exalt your wife over your parents and their family, your job, your car, home or anything else.
- Husbands should not be bitter or resentful to their wives (Colossians 3.19). It is easy to blame someone else for everything that goes wrong. Do not do it. Take responsibility for yourself and be kind to your wife.
- Husbands are to be careful about how they handle their family (1 Timothy 3.12). Do not let your role in the family lead to an embarrassment from other members of the family.
- Husbands are to be spiritual leaders in the family (1 Corinthians 14.35). Do not take this responsibility lightly. There is nothing feminine about being a spiritual example for your children, your spouse, for others. Be careful to always do what God asks. To this end…
o Be an example in prayer.
o Be diligent in worship.
o Let your family see you study the Bible.
o Encourage faithfulness to God among all members of the family.
Husbands have a difficult and important role to fulfill. It is not a job for the uncommitted or haphazard. This is a task for strong men of character who long to fulfill God’s purposes.