The World Goes 'Round

So I have been thinking a lot about people, love, relationships and that sort of thing. Life is very complicated, and people are the largest complicating factor. Just when you have your relationships figured out, something changes in one of them that ultimately effects all of them. I think this is true for everyone except for the prisoner in solitary confinement and the hermit on a deserted tropical island.

As usual, I have tried to make sure that my thinking has not been meaningless rambling around in my head. I am trying to come to conclusions. I want to understand my relationships and how they work. I want them all to be better. To that end, I have made some observations and some decisions.

• I should/ will love as many people as I can. This is true of people I already know and new people that I will meet. If it is true that love makes the world go around, I should do my part. I will be a lover of people.
• There will always be time for my family and people that I truly love. There are a couple of implications in this statement. First of all, I cannot, and will not, be inconvenienced by my inner-circle. That is, they cannot put me out. They are a priority for me. Secondly, Since they are a priority, even if they have to wait because of some other issues, they will always be important to me. They will get their time and attention, even if they have to wait a little while.
• New people in my life may not wait for me to get around to caring for them. There is probably a limited time-window for new people. People that I already have relationships with know that I will be there. New people may not. They may need attention and love right away.
• I should love everyone, all the time. This is true even of people that I do not like. All people are made in God's image. Every individual is one that I should care about and love.

Thoughts on Time, Part I

I have often heard people talk about quality time vs. quantity time. The idea is that there is not enough time to balance everything- work, church, family, home, leisure, hobbies- so something has to suffer. From these constant constraints and demands on time we get all sorts of conflicts. Everyone, it seems, feels guilty because of their lack of time.

There are scores of programs, plans and ideas to help people manage their time. Schedulers and planners are a huge industry in the USA. It seems that there is always a best-selling book or two devoted to time management. People want to speed-read, eat fast food and use the express lane at the supermarket. Hurry, is the mantra of the 21st century. (By the way, have you noticed how slowly microwave ovens cook these days?)

As a result, we have too often bought into the idea of quality time with people since we believe we cannot invest quantity time. Our children will be fine, we think, if we focus on them intensely for the limited time we have to give them. The main problem with this is that it serves mostly to salve the conscience of the one who is limiting his/her time. I feel better about my lack of time and attention if I convince myself that the time I am giving is of exceptional quality.

What a crock!

Look at this issue from the perspective of the one who is on the receiving end of the time. No matter how focused and intent someone is, if they are limited in their time for us, that is what we know and notice. No child has ever thought, "That 30 minutes with dad was the best part of my week." They are more likely to enjoy the 30 minutes, but long for more time.

And that is the whole point. To the receiver love is always equal to time. I know how much I am loved by how much time and energy and person gives to me. When I am dismissed as an after thought, I know that I am relatively unimportant. When a person invests hours with me, cultivating a relationship, I understand that I am loved.

What does this all mean? Do not get caught up in the lie that there is an acceptable substitute for time. There is not. Prioritize your life so that you give your time to the people and places that you love. The people around you believe that you love them in proportion to the time you spend on them. So have a conversation. Go to a show. Play a game. Spend some time with someone you love.

Optimism

Optimism is a choice that we make. You get to choose whether or not you will believe in every conspiracy theory that comes along. You have the ability to decide if you will be negative all the time. Or you can choose to be an optimist.

Optimism is a way of life, a worldview. An optimist chooses to think that things will turn out well. He believes that things are always looking up. He still thinks that he can win when he is down four runs with two outs in the bottom of the ninth. And the optimist believes this way, because he has decided to believe this way.

The choice to be an optimist is one that must be made every day. Each morning bad things will happen. There will be complaints and complainers. Tragedies will come. It would be easy to succumb to pessimism and negativity. That is why optimism must be chosen on a regular basis.

In the Bible we are told that love believes all things. In fact, in that passage, 1 Corinthians 13, we have a veritable laundry list of the attributes of love. We would not do it injustice if we were to believe that love is similar to optimism. Love endures all things; optimism never gives up. Love is kind; optimism wants others to do well.

So, there it is. Optimism is a way of life that comes from choices we make every day. It is not unlike love. So love your neighbors every day.

Poetry/ Song Ideas

• It's Just a Cross (rap)
• If you're happy with nothing, you can be happy with anything
• Serving life without parole
• Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star/ Jesus Loves Me
• I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up
• Look at the Rising Son
• Psalm 56.3-4, 10-11
• Walk This Way
• Come and Worship, worship Jesus Christ the King
• Rockin' Soul
• Crazy Worship

Wicked??

My teenage daughter has become an addict of musical theatre. She has always loved music and especially singing, but musical theatre has become something of an obsession for her. The pinnacle of that love has come in the form of Wicked. Wicked is the story of the Wicked Witch of the West- from the Wizard of Oz- told from the witch's perspective. The musical is based on a novel by Gregory Maguire.
Life begins tragically for Elphaba (that's the witch's name). We learn early in the show that she was conceived as a result of her mother's illicit fling with a traveling salesman. Even worse than that, she is green! As a result of these two terrible occurrences, Elphaba receives no love from her father. In fact, Elphaba's father prefers her younger, wheel-chair bound sister, Nessa Rose.
The ridicule and resentment that Elphaba receives is not limited to her family, however. She is completely different than everyone else. She does not 'fit in'. As a result, she is always picked on and left out in groups.
Without getting too involved in the plot of the story, let me summarize this way. There is eventually a controversy in Oz. The Wizard, in an effort to maintain control and ensure his continued position and popularity, blames Elphaba for all the problems. Elphaba, now forever labeled the Wicked Witch, must either run, or fight the Wizard and his power.
There is not one thing in Wicked that contradicts the 1939 film, 'The Wizard of Oz.' (Both the film and the play take liberties with L. Frank Baum's original novel.) In the movie, the Wicked Witch is most definitely wicked. In the play, however, she is a victim, misunderstood. It turns out that she is the only one with any integrity. Everyone else, society at large, has demonized Elphaba to protect their own interests.
This happens all too often in real life. We point the finger at the faults of someone else so that we look better. We blame a co-worker so that we avoid trouble. We maintain silence, even when we know that someone else is being ostracized for no reason.
It is time that Christians began to live the life that Jesus called us to. We must be honest. We must maintain integrity in all things. We must speak out for those who cannot speak for themselves. We must love all people, whether it is popular or not. You and I must make sure that we always do right.